Life on stall rest

As most of you know, Tillie has had the last two weeks off from being a bit foot sore after a recent trim. Well, as always when she is out of work she gets herself into trouble...

We are looking at another possible two weeks of rest, but this time in a stall. Fellow blogger Emma found Tillie Saturday morning with a pretty nasty wound that ended up requiring stitches.

WARNING: Below pictures are graphic and show the wound...it isnt big or anything, but does show blood...

Emma's picture first finding it.

All cleaned out before the vet arrives.

Wrapped and waiting for the vet...Mare was quite the pistol coming in. Prancing sideways and all sorts of proud of herself. 

The vet suturing it up after lots or protesting to the block....even under sedation.

More stitches.

The next day getting some fresh air.

Her face is just too cute...I cant stay mad too long even if her silly injuries are just silly.

Pre-product review - Philippe Fontaine saddles

I might have a slight addiction problem known as tack-a-holism. But when there is a deal that is too good to pass up, the temptation totally outweighs the voice in my head that says "you really dont need this."

You could say I made a slightly impulsive purchase when Stubben advertised their summer half price saddle sale. I honestly only went in to window shop to make myself feel slightly better about doing something with my horse taking some time off and losing progress in our training by the day. Well I came out with not one, but two new saddles. That's right NEW!

I did sit on them for a day before pulling the trigger...and did my due diligence and did some research. Surprisingly little came up, but the little that did all said nice saddle for the price.

So I went ahead and decided for the price they were selling, why not give it a try!

 Philippe Fontaine Lyon

This is considered their hunter/jumper model. Unfortunately it may be too small as all they had left was a 16.5," but I am hopeful as I do fit in this seat in some brands. Also they only had it in a wide tree - right out of the box does not seem wide (which is better for my narrower ottb). My biggest dislike right off, which knew before buying them, is they are foam flocked. I prefer wool so adjust and change as needed...I guess I can change that down the road if I love it that much. PF boasts the saddle is on their E-motion tree and memory-Flex panels. The brown is a lovely color and not too light or red or any weird shades that, in my experience, wear and fade terribly lighter. 

(* Just a note that Stubben acquired Philippe Fontaine back in 2011 according to my research. Stubben distributes and sells these saddles but does not manufacture them)

The Philippe fontaine website's description of the Lyon: Excellence in performance begins with a well balanced saddle. The hunter/jumper Lyon is designed with a wider seat and a lower center of gravity and is crafted in soft doubled leather. Rider position and security are enhanced by correctly placed front blocks and supportive rear blocks on Velcro. The close contact French style panels are sculpted wider to provide a larger contact area on your horse's back.

The Philippe fontaine website's description of the E-Motion Tree:The E-Motion tree is an integrated spring tree and panel system. This unique tree has a narrow twist and a balanced center of gravity and features a low pommel and a semi cut-back head. It provides controlled flexibility and impact absorption. The tree will flex at all points of pressure. A very limited number of tree widths are needed, as the tree points flex in use and adapt to the horse’s conformation. The E-Motion tree is light weight, immune to extreme heat or cold, and retains its shape, and recessed stirrup bars eliminate the bulk of stirrup leather buckles.

Initial thoughts:  The leather feels buttery soft and nice quality. Some of the stitching seems a bit messy, which Ill try to get a close up shot of...not a huge deal and most likely why it was in their half off bin. The tree width seems narrow for "wide" which I am not complaining about but I have read their trees all tend to run narrow and curvy. I am anxious to sit in them, but the padding feels soft, but not too overdone being a "close contact." The velcro block is nice to adjust, though not a huge area to move it if you for some reason wanted it moved somewhere a bit more outside the allowable area.

  Philippe Fontaine Royan

This is considered one of their dressage models. I love it in person even more than their stock photo online. It got a bit wrinkled in the delivery process, but the flap has more definition or nuances than in the photo. 

The Philippe fontaine website's description of the Royan:  The Royan is covered in extra supple and durable leather with an attractive stitching detail. The soft padded seat and knee areas offer extra comfort. The Royan is built on the E-Motion tree with memoryflex foam panels, and has concealed knee rolls and two long dressage billets. The front billet is attached to the tree point to stabilize the saddle’s contact area.

Initial thoughts:  The leather feels buttery soft and nice quality just like the Lyon. The Billets seem a bit stiff, but being brand new imagine some conditioning and breaking that in will change that. I guess it was more noticeable on this one being they are longer...Some stitching again seems weird, but could be why it was in the half off bin or just something Ill need to look at closer and clean it up. I like this one also seems to have a closer contact feel or build compared to some other dressage saddles and not too ridiculously padded flaps so I can still feel my horse's sides under my leg.

All in all both saddles are nicely made for the cost. I am anxious to sit in each and give them a spin to update here! 

I'd like a sense of humor and a little bit of letting things go please

Horses never cease to surprise us and keep us on our toes. That goes for both the good and the bad. With my horse being laid up for a bit, it takes all I have to not feel like we are getting left behind.



All of us riders that compete know what its like to have goals. It is a never ending uphill climb. I really loved the recent blog post from The Chronicle of the Horse: "Embrace the Suck."

It really felt so great to read that and nod at my desk in agreement (I have never ridden levels or movements that high but can relate!). For us worker bees that work all day and ride by night, it is so hard to get out there everyday. Even if it is a 20 minute ride just to push some buttons you've been working to install. You know, to make sure there is still some moment of "oh yes I remember we had an epic meltdown about this once or twice and realized if I just give in you'll stop the pressure"


Those little rides really do make a difference. So everyday I am sidelined I cant help but think of all the ground I am losing and all the progress made slowly slipping through the cracks that we will have to re-apply when we start back up again.

When I get a bit down and out about my riding and where Tillie and I are, I tend to have a much harder time letting things go and general lack of a sense of humor. I take it all way too seriously. I overthink everything. Both of those things are not good together.




Let's just say I am working on it. Maybe that is my problem...Working too hard at it all!? Let loose, have some fun. Why is that soooo hard to do as an adult? I almost feel guilty or like I am sneaking in the fun and if someone catches me I wasnt being professional or adult enough.

But why do I even care? Who cares if I am a goof? Or where Tillie and I are training wise? I am only making it harder on myself with all these expectations and what I think we should be doing. How about, we are where we are and that is just fine. - HA! if only that could be a mantra I could repeat and actually abide by. I am just as guilty of adding the pressure on myself as I am about caring what other people think.



Conclusion: I need to stop caring so much about what other people think. Tillie clearly could care less:

Tillie stretching after her chiro and acupuncture yesterday

W

Looking for Advice?

Since Tillie is out of commission a few days, I'll post this finally after toying with it for a while.

Talking with fellow blogger: Emma we both came to similar conclusions when it comes to the general topic of "advice" in the horse world. More specifically, why we ask for advice from others. To be clear, this isn't when you ask advice from a trainer or instructor...it's when you ask advice from fellow riders or someone you are not paying.

The end result usually ends with the person you ask getting offended because you rejected their advice, or you get offended by whatever it is they suggest. Even if no one admits to being offended, they are. Not always, but I admit I have gotten a bit ruffled in the past by some advice shared.

 BUT lets visit why we ask for advice to begin with. 

For me, it is usually out of desperation and a place of insecurity. In some way it is my way of seeking some sort of validation. Well when you get an answer you weren't exactly expecting or one that feeds the validation, feelings get hurt. 

So how do we remedy this? It sounds so simple...just dont ask or seek validation from anyone else but yourself and your trusted professional right? Easy peasy. But this wonderful sport totally sucks us in and whether you are a professional or an amateur, one that just dabbles or takes it seriously we all are invested. It's personal.

We are dealing with another living, breathing, thinking thing that throws curve balls our way and forces us to always be on our toes. Some horses more than others! Either way, those curve balls sometimes reveal our insecurities in what we are doing...is my horse happy? Are we  progressing on the right path? Is my horse sound? What comes next? 

Sooooo many questions arise and sometimes even our trusted paid professionals we rely on can't answer them or give us the satisfaction. Mostly we want to know right now! Again, because we want the validation and we want a clear statement with a concrete conclusion. So we ask...or vent about it to those around us and by doing that, it opens the door to receiving the advice.

The advice given is simply what has worked or happened in that particular person's experience. So if you really think about it, they are sharing a piece of themselves with you. They are sharing when they experienced a similar insecure time. I try to remind myself of this...especially when the advice is given unsolicited and without the open door conversation happening.

**Sigh** most of the time I try to believe people's intentions are good. Then the getting offended seems to not happen so easily. 

Our horses always seem to be teaching us the life lesson...time and patience. Two things that are really hard to be ok with and settle into while you're hanging out "in the meantime" waiting for an answer. Whether it is a training/riding frustration or a soundness one - Both are ones that eat at us until we feel we have resolution. 

At the end of the day our horses are our passion. When we question or vent or talk we are questioning our own ability which always makes a person feel fragile. Hopefully there is eventually a resolution which always seems to happen over an extraordinarily long amount of time. BUT hopefully you walk away from it a little wiser.

When life gets crazy - update from our neck of the woods

Unfortunately, I have little to update in regards to riding....Since last Tuesday's lesson with D, I took a few days to mentally build myself up again. I felt that if I rode again and had another off ride it would mean losing the confidence I have slowly gotten back. I also know I probably should have just gotten back on the next day with a fresh slate rather than build it in my head...but work ended up being crazy busy the rest of the week with me prepping to be out of the office the following week. Yay no work for a week!!!

I then had to go home and prep for horse summer camp this week. My time off work is used to do more work!!! But really, I love it and it helps me pay off the large vet bills my accident-prone horse can't resist.

 I only got to squeeze in a ride Saturday. It wasnt phenomenal but it wasnt bad either...all in all it was a good flat school without anything out of ordinary. That is always a good thing.

 Then sunday came and Miseventer was going to come meet up with me to watch but Tillie's left shoe was so loose I had horrific images of it twisting or something and decided to not risk it. No biggie, put in a call to my farrier to come out and he said he would Tuesday. 

Tillie enjoying the attention from summer camp students

Well Summer camp started so my intentions of blogging got sidetracked to say the least. My farrier couldnt make it until Wednesday. I had camp kids so couldnt stand with him like usual and at the end he gave me an overview and said no big deal, but Tillie was sore all over her left front foot. Said to pack it with magic cushion overnight and no bute unless for some odd reason she got worse. Me being me perked up at any sound of discomfort and started to quiz him on the why's and what should I be doing:

1. Her feet were flaky this cycle which he said many have been locally with all the wet and dry weather...wet all night and baking hot and hard ground all day.
2. Her previous farrier had her toes long and break over in the wrong spot 
3. He had to take more foot than he would have liked to get to good foot 

So I wasnt too worried. I packed her and tucked her in for the night without pulling her out of her stall. 

Tillie all tucked in

Well i get here the following  (yesterday) all excited to turn her out and ride her after the last few days off. Except Tillie had other ideas. Her left front leg was pretty hot and swollen and she was clearly short and uncomfortable at the trot...she seemed ok at the walk. **sigh** so I called the vet.

Ok Tillie may be worth more than that now...but still!

The vet came and was shocked I called saying she didnt look terribly uncomfortable or off. I guess since I know her so well I thought it looked worse...sooooooo I basically spent hundreds of dollars for him to tell me she has thin soles....**head desk** (We did some other diagnostics to rule out the swelling etc)

Tillie waiting for the vet begging the kids for more attention

UGH!! I have been working this horse and jumping her all summer with no indication of sore feet or any tenderness until now. I am quite baffled. Also I am trying not to over think it. 

But this is me we are talking about. So I will try to ride her this weekend if she seems comfortable enough.

One step forward Two steps back

I unfortunately have no video or picture evidence of this event (Emma you were greatly missed!)...but my lesson Tuesday night with D was just an epic fail.

We were back to being on the forehand, miss sassy pants who couldnt jump any jump sanely and in non-warp speed.

I guess the good streak had to end at some point eh?

Tillie says "I'm cute" even when I am bad

Luckily, I didnt feel like I was mortified or silently serious like past lessons...I was able to sorta joke with D after running through very hairy jump sequence after jump sequence by shouting "well that was interesting...again?"

To which he would agree and simply say yes with more leg next time. Funny how more leg seems to be the magic solution to everything. 

Our warm up was quite lovely too before he got there. She was supple, moving off both legs and walk-trot-walk transitions were on point from what I felt in recent lessons. She was light and we even did some counter flexions to test our bend in addition to slower steps back to bigger steps all while staying connected. GREAT!

She was a bit excited at the canter tracking left (her harder direction) so we reined it in and it was fine. She was perfectly calm tracking right which is right when D arrived. 

So we went right into trotting X's of the same two-stride grid Tillie owned Friday which I captured in my post: weekend recap. Well different day different horse I guess, because right away she wanted to just run through it...**at this point I havent panicked yet and simply thought ok maybe this was like the XC clinic and she'll get it out of her system**

Oh no, Tillie had different ideas.

D likes to then keeps repeating more leg and let your reins go over jumps to let her make the mistake...well easier said than done when you feel you're going to die. I understand I'm sounding melodramatic right now...but let me tell you, when your horse is diving on the forehand and lunging while at warp speed it totally feels like a face plant is about to happen OR at any moment she will suddenly leap through the air to express how unbalanced she feels. The latter being more likely. 

Pretty much exactly like this

So we went back briefly to flat work to get her off my hands and lighter since she was wanting to drag me down so much. VOILA better on the flat. He made me over exaggerate my half halts and release making it painfully obvious I dont release enough. But releasing happened and it was better. 

Soooooo we added the jumps back in....and got:

Neither I was amused or D but Tillie clearly was.

I guess then D thought maybe higher and more complicated would back her off so he then had us do a 4 stride bending line turning to come back to a 6 stride line and end on the 2 stride grid. 

Ok easier to see then describe:

Well we got over most things...but landing from the line to the 2-stride X's grid was pretty impossible with Tillie landing and then running around like an idiot...to which D finally said just add outside leg and make her do it. She needs to learn you can't always help her when she does this. 

So went through it again, got her through the 2-stride after an opinionated leap through the air and D simply saying ok...well I guess lets run it in reverse. Which, at the first fence of the bending line Tillie took a flyer and I literally had the reins on the buckle and me totally off balance. Thank god mare is honest despite her idiot self and took the second just off my leg. We landed, I said right she said Left-well ok right and I managed to stay on (which is exactly how I fell off her the last time in the SAME. EXACT. SPOT. 

Well the lesson totaled maybe 30-40 minutes and I think D just had enough. Not that I was complaining...it was awful. I apologized at least 3 times for him having to witness that. To which we actually had a conversation about why we were experiencing the inconsistency. 

His theory: the footing. My theory: way too many to list here which may or may not include questioning my horse's sanity.

Anyway, he said with all the rain we have had its been fairly wet sand in our ring which is easier to grip and heavier in a good way which explains her greatness lately. Tuesday it was very dry, and light which he said skids out from under them causing much  more muscle fatigue promoting getting on the forehand. Imagine us running in dry sand on the beach. PLUS the depth of footing is inconsistent - some areas deeper than others and in those areas when Tillie slides or loses the grip she answers with a flying leap of protest. 

Basically the most ridiculous, illogical thing ever.

I am still stuck two days later though on such the big step backwards...and something as silly as footing. Tillie clearly is a diva...but is footing that hugely an issue? If it is, what on earth am I doing trying to make her an event horse. In D's opinion he said it was CLEAR she didnt like the footing. Meanwhile, I have a few ideas.

1. I think she is in heat so a bit less focused and wound up
2. Footing...shes always had issues with slipping, but this sand footing is a new enlightenment 
3. Tired from the 3 rides in a row jumping (I dont typically jump so much but it just happened it fell in the cards that way with lessons)
4. Shes a diva (or just an idiot)
5. It's something I do when riding in front of D

Number 5 I should have listed higher because I think it could easily be the case. I tend to get nervous before lessons with D in general so I am sure I am more tense or something...which is a shame. I love and hate how hard his lessons are...but mostly love how they are so educational for both me and Tillie. Not just for me. But they have also been more on the hairy side like this last Tuesday conditioning my brain to go into *holy shit grab and hold on* mode.

Anyway...I have avoided riding again out of fear my happy bubble I have worked so hard to build will burst. AND because it was my wedding anniversary. More importantly my wedding anniversary...

Eventually Ill need to get back on...until then the pondering continues.