I would like to meet in the middle please...

So this last weekend was, once again, jammed packed with the highest of highs and lowest of lows...mostly due to me getting slightly hysterical upon realizing that our first ST since July is fast approaching. Can you say "OMG?"

Ok, seriously though...that is going on in my head. I need to be better about doing more of these like fellow blogger, Emma and just become a pro at these with tons of miles to make me chill the fuck out. (Excuse my brutal language in this post...I know most previous post I have been tame, but I have bit of a darker sense of humor today).

One of the few pictures youll see of me smiling while riding...AND my eyes are fucking closed.

I was supposed to have a lesson on Friday evening with D. We normally do Tuesday evenings so he forgot. Poor Emma trucked alllllll the way to the barn, broken leg and all, to watch and get her fix to only get to see Tillie and I play around through a one stride grid on our own. I know she also was really anxious to visit and see Isabelle.

In all seriousness though, it was a great night. I had a happy-to-work Tillie and then ended with Emma and I catching up and letting loose. I was so happy to see her since broke herself that we stayed out a long while and talked about ALLLL the horse things. I am so grateful to have horse friends that get it and discuss theories, feedback or anything horse related with. 

So that brings us to Saturday. (Can you already sense my pause before proceeding here?)

Tillie thinks when we rest that xc schooling means eating lots of grass and hanging out.
Bali meanwhile chews annoyingly and  insistently on his bit.

More eating, since all the galloping really starved her.

I had to cross country school Tillie before our show this coming weekend. I managed to convince D to meet me there and do a lesson to prep. After all, its been since my clinic with D that we have done anything outside the ring more than just a hack around with her constantly trying to mutilate herself. 

...anyway...

I was lucky enough to have another blogger join me, Miseventer on Bali (Who Emma has been riding before she broke her leg). Thank God because I was not riding at my best and realllllly needed a reprieve from all the dying inside that was happening you'll soon hear in my videos. 

Thank god for buffers from other riders in lessons so I can catch my breath. 

Tillie warmed up beautifully. There was no leaping through the air or protesting to leg AT ALL like there has been in the past. That was even with letting her gallop with D pressuring me to push and then sitting and bringing her back. 

Here are a few from warm up:

I am so excited with how much better her form is progressing despite mine!

While we didnt get the greatest approach here, she stayed upright despite my shoddy upper body. 

Putting together more of the fences in this field staying more collected...one of the better times through. 

Tillie saving my ass here because I dont know how to sit tall and not lead with my shoulders. 

Then we decided to dive and gallop like a mad woman. See video below,

This is RIGHT after she saved my ass and we came back around to jump the green split rail...needless to say, this is clear she had enough and decided galloping with her head between her knees would teach me a lesson.

Look at those knees!!!

Moving on to new jumps, I apparently am still dense and not grasping this whole waiting thing. 

So we try again...I do a bit better with the exception of the black tube jump and Tillie decide after taking a bit of a long spot to the angled fence to celebrate. Good news is I only needed ONE circle before regaining control to finish over the final fence. 

Tillie clearly needs as much work on going up banks as I do going down them. At least water seems to distract her enough to engage a more focused and willing horse. 

These stills just turned out so neat...ears forward, happy and knowing her job = happy me!!

Eating up the bank even if it was a bit awkward.

And finally...one more shit fit:

LEG IS EVILLLLLLL.

Warp speed because I am tired seems like a safe way to go.

Leg? WTF?!

OK we trotted it, now we cantered it so I must see all the things over as fast as I can.

Well ok, I really dont know what all the fuss was about. 

Well this ditch doesnt eat horses after all. 

I apologize for the media overload but its nice to see what is working and what isn't visually. I am such a visual learner that it really helps me understand better what is being discussed theoretically in the moment. 

While it wasnt our most fun schooling ever, I do feel like we walked away with some positives and some homework.

The positives:

• Tillie kept her calm for much longer than usual in past XC Schoolings 
• She didnt suck back or get spooky at any question
• She saved my arse quite a few times
• Her form has improved tremendously

The negatives

• Tillie still celebrates after some fences when more speed is added
• Tillie dives or takes off after some fences, especially if they are down hill
• My positive sucks (more specifically and in constructive crit - lower leg and core are weak and need strength)
• I need to wait and sit back..even when Tillie takes the gappy distance

All in all, I am please with her baby brain growing. It is apparent we need to make riding out in the field and adjusting all gaits (especially the canter) less of a big deal. So homework is to ride all gaits in the open field at home and jump what we have without using so much rein. 

Sounds soooooo simple right?