If you don't succeed try, try again

My mother used to say the saying over and over again, "if you don't succeed, try, try again." Sometimes in a really annoying sing song voice to try to be cheerful when I was down and out about my latest failure. I never appreciated it as much as a kid, but looking back that very support and blind activism to keep trying has made me the glutton for punishment I am today.

No professionals to be found here

Competing and getting noticed in this wonderful sport of horseback riding is not easy. Its flooded with other go getters just like me with the never-give-up attitude. For someone like me who started extremely late and didnt attend my first show until an adult, well you could say I have a lot of catching up to do.

Oh sooo much catching up to do

Its so easy to fall into the trap of never feeling good enough and always doubting my abilities...after all when good riders rider they make it look so easy and effortless. Us fellow riders know that its not, and it isnt for them either...we just get to see the outcome of countless hours in the saddle ironing out all those kinks everyday - some even with it being their full time jobs.

I am just an ordinary person, with an ordinary job, an ordinary social media following (probably with friends and family members tired of the posts gushing about my horse) and a blog to record the progress I make with my horse.

Oh so ordinary complete with trials and tribulations

I fall off, I get back on and I write about it...usually just long winded journals for myself to reflect. I wont deny that I have dreams to be a professional rider, but I am realistic to admit I am not there. I am very much ordinary and its taken me a long time to say that is ok.

It is ok to try and fail. For a long time after getting Tillie, my first off the track green bean horse, I expected myself to always be perfect so I wouldnt ruin her. I started being a working student in addition to my full time job and teaching lessons on the weekend (holy cow that is a lot!) to make sure I was doing it right.

Right or not, it was not all roses and I felt like more often then not I was doubting whether or not this was the right choice for my start in eventing. The advice I have heard after already getting my cheap OTTB was to lease a packer...well gee I did this all backwards...I should have been a working student before getting a new horse and learned on something seasoned for a few years.

Rolex 2015...doubt Ill ever get here but Ill keep dreaming

So the point of this blog is to just throw out there that its ok to fail because it stands for = first attempt at learning. It may take a few tries, but when you finally get that right answer, the good ride or that harmonious moment when it all comes together, it really does make up for the losses. I have finally come to a point where I no longer doubt if Tillie is not the right horse for me. She pushed me past my comfort zone, and still does. She's made me stronger and, under the helpful eyes of many many trainers and instructors (Ill refrain from listing them at risk of embarrassing them from my riding), we have finally seemed to reach a place where we are working together. I am so excited for this year...I know we will have ups and downs, but Im going to keep trying!

When you try and dont succeed, you try try again. Try enough times, you may just get it right!